Girl Meets Boy...

       

Andrew Ryan & Kristi Marie

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      Some of you may or may not have heard my actual story of how my now husband and I met. Looking back it seems like we were destined to be together as I was best friends with his cousin. When I moved to this town in middle school she lived a few houses down and she was my first and most constant friend throughout all of high school. Sarah was dependable and full of life and we had so many special memories together. We still have fun together and honestly she's like another sister of mine.

     Anyway, I was always with Sarah and her family during middle and high school and I knew of her cousin Andrew but never thought much of dating him or anything like that. We honestly never really talked at all until we were Seniors in high school. I specifically remember Sarah telling me on the bus one day, "You should just date my cousin Andrew..." to which I responded, "Eww no Sarah, that'd be weird!" I laugh every time I tell that story. She was right. I went all through high school not dating anyone and truly not worrying about it. I was always a little awkward and very reserved. I had great friends and grew out of my shyness very quickly being around them, but I was still not one to worry about dating, going out on Friday nights and worrying about what other people thought. I was pretty self-conscious but at the same time I was comfortable with my life. I went to most dances by myself and had a ton of guy friends because  I love sports and would rather talk about baseball and basketball plays than gossip about other girls. 

I was quite content with my life and where my future was heading the summer before my Senior year. I knew I wanted to go to Salisbury University to pursue a degree in Elementary Education and I was looking forward to my last year of Varsity Field Hockey. Just before August arrived I remember getting a message from a Fetty screen name and to my surprise he just wanted to talk and see what was new. We talked and I remember thinking hmm that was really nice. Weeks went on and after exchanging numbers that summer I found myself constantly wanting to talk to him and know what he was doing. He was always so easy to talk to and could make me laugh at the drop of the dime. He asked me out on a date during preseason of our fall sports seasons and we went to what is now my absolute favorite restaurant; Iron Hill Brewery. I ordered a salad (What was I thinking?!) and we talked for hours. He even let me change his radio without asking and was okay with me telling him that he was driving too fast. (typical of me.) One date led to another and hours upon hours of fun and laughter began. Andrew quickly became my best friend and brought out the best of me. On September 8, 2005 a nervous Andrew asked if I would be his girlfriend to which I quickly responded, "Duh, of course!"

     Fast forward to college applications, amazing Senior year sports seasons, prom court, etc. Enter college and welcome a mix of emotions and quite a few challenges. I personally endured part of the darkest time of my life but overcame with faith and family. Andrew left SU in 2007 and when he returned for my graduation I was a different person; for the better. I student taught in New Zealand for 2 months and embarked on a journey that made me so confident in my purpose and my abilities. Andrew always believed in my dreams and still does.We got engaged after about 8 years of dating and about 2 weeks after I was officially hired as a Second Grade Teacher. Andrew says he knew it was time. Despite worrying about where to live, how much money or lack of money we had, he knew that we were ready to move on. Like he always does, he went with his gut, bought my ring and made it a day I'll never forget. We went to lunch at our favorite spot and where we had our first day. I don't get salads there anymore! We had such a fun day and of course I didn't think much of our lunch because I did just get hired and he told me he wanted to celebrate. When I asked upon pulling into his Aunt's neighborhood why so many cars were there he just said that he hated to tell me the surprise

but they were throwing a surprise celebration party for me! I cried. A lot. I'm so naive sometimes; clearly. I walked into the house and get chills remembering just how overwhelmed I felt. Literally all of my closest family and friends were there with tears in their eyes. At this point I still didn't get it. But I cried knowing that my precious grandmother drove hours to be there. I turn around and couldn't find Andrew anywhere! Behold, he was shaking nervously about to get to one knee after telling me in front of our families that he has always considered himself the lucky one and that he had dreamed of this day for a long time. He remembered knowing I was the one after only a short time. He asked me to be his wife to which I cried and exclaimed yes of course! Everyone cheered and clapped and cried! Go figure :) We celebrated that day and continue that tradition as often as we can! We love to be with family and just have fun wherever we go.

      On June 22, 2013 we got married. We were married in the same church many of his family members were and the church we were a part of growing up. Our close and trusted friend Brett married us and we were surrounded by over 200 close friends and family. We worshipped, we had amazing readings by family in English and Spanish, my sister kissed him on the cheek before I walked out, we drove off in a 1964 Corvette Stingray and the rest is history.  Of course there were many things that happened that day that could have been disastrous, trust me. I decided to overlook those and focus on the amazing things of that day. For instance, we got to the church and forgot the flower girl's dress. My amazing dad 2 came to our rescue and got it just in time. The bridesmaids flowers were so ugly I almost cried upon seeing them. My mom's being the amazing moms they are, picked out the ugliest flowers and made them work. Our food was cold, we were rushed eating and my slideshow wouldn't work right. That's not the things I remember most though. I remember the feeling of waking up and having breakfast and coffee with my best friends while laughing hysterically to Bridesmaids. I remember my mom's card and her gift to me of her pearls. I

remember walking down the steps the first time everyone saw me dressed. I remember Andrew's friend Danny giving me a letter moments before I walked down the aisle. It was the most perfect letter I've ever read. I still read it time to time. He has such a way with words. I remember the 3 piano notes that played just as I walked out to "A thousand years" by Christina Perri and Andrew stared at me while tears fell from his eyes. I remember my dad walking so slow and I remember looking around me to see so many genuinely happy eyes. I remember my bridesmaids looking as gorgeous as ever and I remember one of my best friends snapping pictures left and right so perfectly.

I remember the pictures of us while we walked down the aisle that showed us as kids up until our engagement pictures. I remember the worship songs played by our friend Pete who is in the band at the church we attend. I remember my knees shaking while I recited my vowels. I remember crying and having Andrew wipe my tear away. I remember Ben Rector singing, "I never knew that I could love someone the way I loved you..." As we made our first walk hand in hand after being officially married. I remember the ride in the Corvette and I was so afraid my birdcage vail would fly away. I remember our friend Kenny, the DJ, introducing us. I remember the laughter, tears and congratulations we heard all night. I remember the genuine happiness that we saw from everyone who was there. I remember that I was not one bit nervous and was so excited to be Mrs. Fetterolf. I remember the looks, the love and the grace that enveloped me that day and continues to do so every day of my life. 

      It's so nice having a confidant, a supporter and an entertainer by your side every time you're in need. I was blessed to move to Elkton and meet this guy who with his family and his genuine faith has changed my life forever. The Fetterolf family is a family unlike any other and if you met the grandparents that started it all you would understand why.

They are truly two of the most beautiful and giving people I've ever met. If I could be half the woman his grandmother and mine are, I will be okay! They met in high school and continue to live a happy and beautiful life because they know what's important, what's not and whose they are. Andrew's aunts and uncles have marriages that have overcome and outlasted a great deal but they remind us that love can overcome. I could not have asked for a better name to take on. Our entire families were there the day I got engaged and continue to be there with us every step of our journey. For that, I am extremely grateful. 

    I'm often told our relationship is that of a best friend's relationship. It is. We know what's important, we believe and we try to be selfless as we have been selflessly loved and forgiven. I l o v e my life and I love knowing that every step of the way I am not alone. Through jobs, miracles, moves, sports, kids, death and grief I will never be alone. 

                                             

                                                 

What Cancer CAN'T do...

"You beat cancer by how you live, why you live and and the manner in which you live."

   - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -       This year has been full of some unfortunate events for family and friends and many of them revolve around Cancer. I have known personally of a couple of people who have passed away this year and 2 more special women currently battling breast cancer. These people all had and have one thing in common. They are believers. They have this,strength and inner peace inside of them that reminds you they will be okay. One of the boys in class is directly affected by someone in his family going through chemo and the diagnosis itself. He is 8 years old and worries about her. But, he knows she is strong and has shared, "even though she looks kinda like a boy he says, she is still so pretty." My students made 2 women I know currently fighting a bouquet of flowers made out of paper that are colorful and full of positive words since we were studying adjectives.

 These kids and teenagers I'm surrounded by have reminded me that Cancer does not have to define your life. Cancer can do a lot to people but it cannot stop you from believing and loving life around you.

Graduation. Class of :((:2015:)):

"The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams." -Elenor Roosevelt 

((It's hard to believe that 5 years ago I graduated from Salisbury U. and almost 10 years ago I graduated from high school. So much has changed since those last 10 years and I am so grateful. I have endured a great deal of pain but I have gained so much more. I am stronger, wiser and much more confident. I know who I am and I know why I am here. I don't have to time to let others bring me down and I don't want to be someone who complains and brings others down. Knowledge is gained through experience and I am looking forward to learning, experiencing and loving through the next chapters of my life. I'm so lucky to have my husband, my family, friends and most importantly my faith to guide me through any trial and any storm. I can and I will. 

Here is the speech I was honored to give to the graduating class of 2015 at EUMC. While I have never been asked to share any wisdom based on my young life I can honestly say I am so glad I was able to. We all have a story and we all need to share it. We need to realize life isn't easy but we don't have to do it alone. I hope everyone can reflect on where they are and realize it's not where you've been and it's not yet where you can go.))

Keep on, keeping on.


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Good evening,

         When I was first approached to speak to you tonight I have to admit I was a little confused. I often forget that I am 26 and have been a graduate of Salisbury University for 5 years and a teacher for CCPS for 3 years. My journey thus far has been extremely rewarding despite many setbacks and trials I have had to face. I hope that throughout the upcoming years of your life that you remember to keep your faith and enjoy the j o u r n e y!

         When I graduated from high school I remember feeling so excited to start this new chapter, but  I was also so apprehensive. I was looking forward to being on my own and becoming a teacher, something I’ve dreamed of doing since I was a little girl with my stuffed animals. However, the day I was dropped off at Salisbury I was overwhelmed. I had never met my roommate, I wasn’t sure what to expect for my classes and to be honest I could not imagine leaving my family and not seeing them every night. During this time my family was experiencing a great difficulty that affected me directly. I remember experiencing a great deal of stress that affected my mood daily. I was impatient, insecure and quite honestly a little angry. My relationship with my boyfriend was negatively affected, as was my relationship with God. Luckily, my roommate was an honest and caring person and became a wonderful friend to me. My boyfriend was encouraging and ever so patient. But most importantly, one of the RA’s in my building changed my life by a simple invitation. Megan was always so positive and so encouraging and one Thursday night at Cru (Campus Crusades for Christ) I found out why. She was in love with Jesus and lived to worship him and show his love to others.

         On this particular Thursday night I was not sure what I was about to enter into but I knew I desired a spirit much like hers. What I experienced was truly life changing. These people were so free and so giving in their worship that I truly felt moved. I remember crying in my seat and feeling overwhelmed, but in a new way. I was overwhelmed with peace and love. I made Jesus a renewed priority in my life that night and I decided from that moment on to continue my journey with my faith instead of my head. Cru became a safe haven for me and encouraged me weekly to grow in my relationship with God, which enabled me to grow in my relationship with others.   Throughout my college years I did face temptation but I learned from my mistakes and I kept my goals in mind.

After my freshman year, my family officially became a family of 3 and I learned to start being honest with myself and with others. I learned that it is okay to take time for yourself and to eliminate people from your life that “suck” the life out of you. After the Fall semester of my sophomore year, my boyfriend, Andrew left to study at a different college and I was left to transition myself again. Instead of worrying, I learned to become more independent and more driven. I joined a club field hockey team and began working as a child sitter at a nearby church. My grades became better and I was exercising daily which improved my overall attitude. Cru continued to be an amazing source of love and peace for me at my time in Salisbury and it led me to a core group of friends that forever changed my life. I joined a bible study circle with 5 girls and throughout the years we met, talked, cried and laughed together. We would go to the movies together, beach trips, more beach trips and I eventually lived with 7 of them the last 2 years of my college career. Brooke Pinder and I had known each other since high school but we developed a new relationship that I still treasure today. The last semester of my college career brought new excitements and new fears as I quickly realized I was nearing graduation again and wasn’t quite sure if I was ready to be on my own. During my last 3 months of school I was lucky enough to be accepted to a study abroad program for part of my teaching internship. I completed 6 weeks of teaching at a school in Delmar, MD and I completed 8 weeks of teaching in New Zealand.

         Somehow I had gone from a shy, worrisome girl to an adventurous (sort of…. my husband would disagree) and confident 21 year old. I remember the flight being so very long and I experienced homesickness on a whole new level. I remember calling home one day after school (4pm on a Wednesday and it was about 11pm on Tuesday at home) and asked my mom to please let me come home early. She and the rest of my family prayed for me and asked me to stay patient and soak in all I could. I decided to focus on what I had and decided to truly experience this culture I was blessed to be a part of. This became yet another life changing and inspirational experience for me spiritually, physically and emotionally. I became very attached to my home-stay family and still

speak with them today! I learned a great deal about the world and how amazing it is. I learned the beauty of being a teacher that inspires her students and teaches them valuable life lessons that they can only learn outside the classroom windows. (There the schools had a lot of windows and no walls!) I traveled all over the North Island and met some amazing people. Every person I met was so welcoming and embodied the “Kiwi way.” They were in love with their country and they placed values on their faith and family. The schools taught about Christianity and they had time to worship together. Stores closed before dinnertime so everyone could eat with their families, and on Saturdays there were market days, craft fairs and parades. On Sundays stores were closed and people enjoyed time with their families. I gained so many new values during my time in New Zealand that I continue to implement as a teacher, a citizen of a country I love, and as a follower of Christ.

         I graduated a week after returning to the states and I’m pretty sure I was still jet lagged during the ceremony. My graduation meant so much more to me than I even think I realized at the time. My diploma represented hope for my future and looking back now, I feel it was a reflection of my determination and the support of my family and friends who helped make it possible. I was the first in my family to graduate from college and I became the first teacher in my family. I was a graduate who was raised by a single mom that worked numerous jobs and sacrificed her time and money for my sister and I. My sister helped me to always remain true to myself and to never give up on my dreams. She was an example of that as a teenager because she started playing field hockey as a freshman in high school and despite many people telling her she would never make it, she became a Division III all-star athlete and a national championship contender. Salisbury was so good to me and I feel that when I left there I was prepared for so much more than a job interview.

         My life continued to take me on a path of happiness and love after I graduated. After 2 long-term substitute positions, I was hired as a Second Grade teacher and just completed my third official year in our county. I truly love what I do and thank God for the gift of working with such amazing children. I was engaged during my first year of teaching (guess Andrew wasn’t tired of me after all) and we were married here on June 22, 2013. My college roommate from my freshman year was my photographer and I get to celebrate her wedding very soon as one of her best friends! 

         I’m not here to tell you that the next 4 years of your life are going to be easy but I can honestly tell you that they will be worth it. Enjoy the little things. Enjoy the walks (despite how cold and rainy they may be) to the food hall, enjoy the late night talks with your roommate, enjoy the football games and most importantly keep God with you. Find God in the quiet moments outside, in a close-knit group of friends and during worship at a nearby church or group. When you feel alone or out of hope, reach out to friends and family. My family supported me at all times of my life and I still call them for anything today! Sandy was a great resource for me as she was always willing to listen and always reminded me of the love of God. Please believe in yourselves and enjoy this opportunity that you have been given and that you have worked so hard to achieve.  If you are seeking employment or starting a career after graduating from college I pray that you remain patient and allow God’s timing to guide your decisions. It seems like you are constantly forced to make decisions but I believe that when looking for a career or even a job to help pay for bills and loans, God will always provide. We just have to trust in his timing.

         Congratulations to all of you! I am praying for you and wish you all of the strength and happiness that you deserve! I’d like to leave you with these words before we depart:

Proverbs 19:21

Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose, that prevails.

Jeremiah 29:11

¹¹ For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you                                                                  hope and a future.